Nothingness... Endless drifting through the void...
Dim red light. The taste of oil. The smell of sweaty feet. The feel of wet nappies. ...
You regain consciousness on a stretcher in some type of underground sewer, surrounded by a bunch of ragged hobos with mad staring eyes.
"He's awake, Morpheus." says a dark haired waif on your left.
A large leering, gap-toothed man steps over and looks into your face. "Time to learn Krav Maga." he says as he jams something sharp into the back of your skull.
A split second later you realise you're in the middle of a brightly lit japanese dojo, garbed in oriental combat clothes. The same large toothy man, Morpheus, stands in front of you, giggling uncontrollably.
"What's going on?" you ask in puzzled trepidation as you watch him slowly crouch into a fighting pose.
"That's for me to know and you to find out" Morpheus sniggers, lashing his foot into your groin, and immediately following up with a flurry of kicks, punches and head butts.
"What the hell?" you yell in pain and consternation as you desperately try to fend off the vicious attack.
"Do you think this is AIR that you're breathing?" Morpheus suggests cryptically as he slaps you across the face. "Actually it's not!", he giggles, "This is MY simulation, so I replaced it with Nitrous Oxide - just for laughs!"
A flash of inspiration hits you. "Well, if normal rules of physics don't apply then I can just use magic." you exclaim.
"Accio magic wand", you yell, and a magic wand flies into your hands. "Expectorate!", you shout, and a blast of gooey liquid smashes Morpheus across the room. Choose the next spell:
"Apparate" to get the hell out of here
"Avada Kedavra" to finish Morpheus off