jokes.js

exports.setups = [
  "Alcoholics should become unfunny comedians",
  "Ever wondered why written jokes about mailmen are generally unfunny?",
  "How does NASA organize their company parties?",
  "A joke is like a frog...",
  "I once knew a very humourless kleptomaniac.",
  "I just won a humourless competition.",
  "What is grey and unimportant?",
  "I once met a crazed man muttering incoherently about Ancient Mesopotamia"
];

exports.punchlines = [
  "All the free boos they could ask for",
  "They are all about delivery.",
  "They planet",
  "When you dissect it, it dies. Get it? Just like a frog dies when you dissect it, so does a joke when you explain it. Basically, the frog is used as an analogy, to help people understand that jokes shouldnt be explained, because the joke will die.",
  "He always took things literally.",
  "No joke",
  "An irrelephant",
  "But I had to stop him, because I didnt want him to Babylon"
];

exports.funFacts = [
  'Not endorsed by ISC, definitely not a part of the BIND package either!',
  'Made by Phpminor, who should REALLY consider changing his username!',
  'JS-Dig\'s birthday is August 8th, 2021.\nPlease consider wishing it \033[32mhappy birthday\033[0m when that comes around',
  'Too horizontal for you?\nTry the \033[32m+newlines\033[0m argument at the end.',
  'You can access the Helpdesk using \'jsdig.js -h\' to read some offline documentation included with JSDig!'
]